Are you thinking about dating again? Maybe you are “in the market” to find that guy after being “out of the market” for a while. If you are divorced or widowed, you may find this dating scene overwhelming and wonder if you can do this again. Here are some pointers to help you if you are just starting to date again.
It’s OK not to date.
Many around you will be pushing you to date or trying to set you up. If you are not ready to make the emotional investment that courtship requires, please know that it is fine for you to wait to start dating. You may need to work out some things in your own life. The pain of your loss or the hurt from a divorce may still be too raw for you to open up to the vulnerability of dating again. If you are not ready, do not start dating yet. If others keep pushing you, kindly ask them to give you some time and some space to work through what needs to be dealt with. Not every single lady should be dating.
Take it slow.
When you feel that it is right to date, take the process very slowly. You will find yourself in more trouble than you can imagine if you get in too deep with the wrong man. And, your judgment and discernment may be a little rusty. So, don’t dive into the deep end at the beginning. Take it slow. The only way to determine if he is the right man is time. Let time pass and take baby steps as you re-enter the dating scene. Crawl back into dating, don’t sprint.
Many ladies are willing to settle for the wrong guy because they fear being alone. Hear this truth: being with the wrong guy is far worse than being alone. Do not lower your standards because no one will “accept you.” If he won’t accept you for the person you are and the standards you set, he is not the right guy for you. Do not settle thinking that no one else will come along. Let God show you who is right. But, don’t put up with just any guy. You deserve better than that.
Dating should be fun. If it ends up being more stress than fun, take a step back. If it looks like life is starting to go in the wrong direction because of dating choices you are making, take a step back. Enjoy the process. Enjoy the new relationships. Relax and enjoy the dating. If you can’t do that, then you are not ready yet.
The time will come when you will date again. Do it right because wrong will really mess you up.
Answer This: What does it mean to you to find the right person to date?