In this day and age, if you’re a dating couple in the Western world, just about everything typically goes. So when you throw a healthy relationship with God into the mix, some people view your boundaries as a little off kilter. Couples heaven bent on doing things God’s way sometimes have a social dilemma. For instance, holding hands is typically seen as OK for a dating couple. Kissing is generally viewed as acceptable for a dating couple. But those with a different perspective sometimes wonder why, as a follower of Christ, the line is drawn so strongly that taking those next steps toward sexual activity and eventually sexual intercourse is wrong? Why is sex different than holding hands and kissing? Well, here are three undeniable reasons sex and affection are not cut from the same cloth.
Sex connects physically, emotionally, and spiritually
When a couple has sexual intercourse, there is a connection that happens between that man and woman that can happen in no other way. For instance, through discussions, their minds can connect. Through holding hands and kissing, their bodies can connect. But, through intercourse, their souls connect.
That soul connection is a deep seeded reality for both parties who engage in sexual contact and sexual intercourse. The connection joins them together in such a way that God intended the couple to stay together in a covenant act of marriage. Sex touches us where nothing else can. It is different. It is commitment unleashed.
Sex is an internal, not external act
Most of what we deal with are on the outside of who we are. We get cold because the temperature is cold around us. We shake hands and high five our friends and acquaintances. We see the outside of people, their clothes and hairstyle. But sex is actually an internal, not an external act.
Through sexual intercourse, we go beyond the typical interaction to a deeply personal display of the heart. The reality of this internal nature of sex is an act that we carry with us longer than we expect. If the outside gets dirty, we take a shower and wash off with soap and water. How do we clean a heart that gets dirty from inappropriately “getting it on?” We can’t. Fortunately, God can. But, sex is different.
Sex cannot be undone
Because sex is such an internal, intimate act, it cannot be undone. Though God forgives when we mess up with sex, it matters greatly when a couple connects sexually. For a married couple, it is a beautiful thing that God blesses. But, for a couple that is not yet married, the intimacy displayed surpasses what God intends before marriage.
Treat intercourse carefully because it is different. No other level of connection compares. Save it for your marriage.
Answer This: Which matters more to you – sex or affection…and why?