For those choosing the path of abstinence out of obedience to God, there are three questions that might pop into your head that could cause you to doubt your decision to have your first sexual encounter on your wedding night. For those wanting to jump the gun and have sex before marriage, you will answer the questions in a convenient, self-serving way. Don’t buy into the wrong answers that premarital sex gives for these questions.
Don’t I Need Experience in Bed Before My Wedding Night?
No. You don’t.
If you are afraid that your wedding night will go unbelievably wrong because you or he or both don’t have any experience with sex, here is a word of encouragement…you will figure it out.
Couples, for centuries, have learned quickly how this sexual intimacy bond works. You and your new husband will not miss out on anything with a lack of experience. In fact, you will have the joy of learning together what each of you likes and doesn’t like.
You will be able to go down that road together and it will be as pure and innocent as freshly fallen snow. And here is one other truth for the newly married couple…if you mess it up the first time, you will get to try again and again. Your lack of experience will be a huge positive, not a negative.
Are We Compatible with Each Other?
Yes. You are.
Some worry about being compatible in bed. You will be incredibly compatible because you will be learning together how to make it work. And, you will be making the guilt-free emotional and spiritual connections outside the bedroom as well.
Premarital sex leads to insecurities and the guilt of feeling wrong, especially for Christians. Without those constraints, your compatibility will flourish. Rather than the sex keeping you together, your love and your vows are keeping you together. Compatibility is guaranteed in that atmosphere.
Will He Stick Around If He Must Wait?
Yes. He will…if he’s worth marrying.
Some women are scared that they will lose their man if she will not satisfy him in bed before marriage. Instead, use the time before the “I do” to measure his character, his loyalty, his obedience to God, and his love for you.
The selfish man pressures you. Selfish boyfriends and selfish fiancés become selfish husbands. If he is that selfish before marriage, your marriage is going to be very difficult anyway. It is better to know these things before the wedding than after it. Waiting until marriage is a way for him to prove to you that he is not selfish but giving.
The lies of premarital sex are abundant. Don ‘t fall for them. Look objectively at the big questions of the relationship that sex cannot answer.
Answer this: What other lies about premarital sex have you been told?